Entry tags:

actually, love

Love, actually
Title: Love, actually
Author: quill_lumos
Rating: NC-17
Pairing(s): Severus/Harry
Summary:Harry thinks he allergic to potions ingredients, but there is a lot more than that going on
Warnings: shmoop.
Word Count: 1500 ish
Author's Notes: This was written for the Alan Rickman film fest at the Severus *sighs* Yahoo group. These characters do not belong to me and I make no money from this story. This story is a series of 200 word drablets linked by the song Love is all around, as used in the film Love Actually. Thanks to whitecotton for the quick polish and to Cyndie for doing her usual steller job

Love, actually


I feel it in my fingers
I feel it in my toes
The love that’s all around me
And so the feeling grows

Harry’s decided that he’s developed an intolerance to one of the ingredients; that has to be why his skin tingles whenever he’s in Potions. He’s back at Hogwarts, like so many of his year, needing to gain qualifications so that he can become an Auror and, of course, he has to take Snape’s class. But he feels rather differently towards the man having seen him almost die.

Snape seemed to feel differently too. At least, Harry thinks he does. He watches Harry with hooded eyes, dark and unfathomable and Harry gets goose bumps. Oftentimes, the hairs on the back of his neck bristle, sending shivers down his spine and it seems to be getting worse. He seems to be able to tell where the man is without having to turn and look, as if they’re connected somehow.

Sometimes he catches sight of Snape staring at him from the corner of his eye, but when he looks up, Snape’s gaze is always elsewhere. He doesn’t understand why he feels more alert when he’s around his teacher, why his skin fizzes with sensation at the sound of his voice, or why he’s come to crave that feeling.

Maybe he’s allergic to Snape?

It's written on the wind
It's everywhere I go

Severus can’t stop watching him; the boy has become the focus of his world. He always has been, of course, ever since he’d told the Dark Lord about the prophecy, ever since he’d caused the death of the only person he would ever love. At least, that’s what he’d once thought. He had loved her, his Lily, with all of his being, but he’d never been so entranced, as he is now with her son. He couldn’t even visualise her face anymore, not like he used to. All he can see, all he wants to see, is Harry.

He loves the long curve of the boy’s neck as he bends over his cauldron, the way his hair curls away and spills around his face, exposing the vulnerability of his spine. Severus wants to lick along the delicate line of bones, see if they taste as good as he imagines they do.

The boy sees him again and a flash of puzzlement shows in those green eyes; Severus aches with need. It hurts to be with the boy and know Harry can never be his, it hurts even more to be away from him yet see him anyway, everywhere he looks.

So if you really love me
Come on and let it show

“What’s his problem anyway?” Harry, all indignant, asks his friends one day. “He’s always staring at me. Does he still hate me, d’you think?”

Ron laughs, a little harshly, Harry decides. “I dunno, mate, maybe he fancies you. He looks kind of hungry when he stares at you, I reckon.”

Does he? Harry wonders, not quite able to dismiss Ron’s statement. Surely not?

But when he looks closer, there is a dark heat in Snape’s gaze as well as something almost tender. Though Harry thinks there is something else, too, something bordering on shame. But he sees no need for such an emotion. Harry has known little enough love in his life, at least the part of it he can remember. He thinks Snape should say so, approach him, if he really does fancy Harry, that is.

They’re a lot alike really, he and Snape and there is something rather magnetic about the man. If Snape were to drop a hint or ask him out, Harry realises he wouldn’t be averse to giving it a try.

But Harry, really, can’t see that it’s up to him to make a first move; Snape might just kill him… if he were wrong.

You know I love you and I always will
My mind’s made up by the way that I feel
There’s no beginning, there’ll be no end
‘Cause on my love you can depend

Harry’s guessed, Severus decides. The way the boy… no, the young man, looks at him has changed. There used to be suspicion and hatred in those green eyes, now there is only curiosity.

For several weeks he vacillates… he doesn’t know what to do.

Then, one day when Harry is handing in his homework, their fingers brush against each other and Severus feels a frisson of heat. Harry feels it too, Severus can tell, his cheeks flush with a delicate wash of pink.

“Potter,” he says, his own face feeling hot beneath Harry’s regard. “Stay behind at the end.”

Harry doesn’t speak, but he raises an eyebrow in a gesture that is strangely familiar.

When they are alone, the silence lays between them like a thick, winter blanket.

Finally, Severus reaches out and cups the other man’s cheek, gratified when Harry leans into his touch.

“I will look after you,” he promises. “I always have and I always will.”

“I know you have,” Harry whispers and when Severus claims his mouth he welcomes the kiss with a passion Severus has always suspected was there and with a desire he would never have guessed at. “Thank you, Severus.”

They kiss again.

I see your face before me
As I lay on my bed
I cannot get to thinking
Of all the things you said

Harry lay in the darkness of his room in Gryffindor tower. All he can see is Severus, as vividly as if the man was in front of him. He thinks of his face so differently now, the large nose is noble and strong, the firm jaw enthralling, the dark eyes sublime, especially when they are sparkling with laughter. Laughter, he thinks with a sudden thrill, who would have thought it of Snape? Except, he isn’t Snape to Harry anymore, they’ve kissed; he’ll always be Severus now.

Harry traces his lips with a finger, they’re flavoured with a kiss; he has never been kissed like that before, with such passion, such possessiveness. His cock lies fat and needy against his thigh and his hand reaches down to touch it. It’s so sensitive he nearly arches off the bed at the feel of his palm against the hot aching flesh, but it’s not his hand he wants. His cock jerks in response but he needs so much more. He needs a different hand to complete him, one with the fingers of an artist; and a voice talking him to completion, a voice as warm as molasses and yet as smooth as velvet.

You gave your promise to me and I gave mine to you
I need someone beside me in everything I do
You know I love you, I always will
My mind’s made up by the way that I feel
There’s no beginning, there’ll be no end
‘Cause on my love you can depend

Severus lay in bed, thinking of Harry. He’d said he wanted them to try, to see if there could be a relationship between them. He’s due to leave school tomorrow, a qualified wizard in the eyes of the world, a man fully grown, but what a man; he is magnificent. Severus is relieved he’d been able to wait until Harry was no longer officially a student, though he was more mature than many men Severus’ age, more mature that Severus, come to that. He’d asked him if he thought they had a chance, if Harry would move in with him, just for a trial, for the summer. Then he’d sent him away to think about it.

Harry had acquiesced. He hadn’t laughed at Severus, or dismissed him as Severus had feared he might. Now he knew for certain that what he feels for Harry is irrevocable. He will love him forever,had loved him forever. He will never let Harry down, never again.

“Oh, Harry!” he tells the darkness. “I’ll always be there should you want me.”

He closes his eyes tight shut and tries to believe that Harry might keep his promise, when so many others have not.

I got to keep it moving
It’s written in the wind
Oh everywhere I go
So if you really love me
Come on and let it show

Severus was almost asleep when he hears the gentle knocking on his door, rousing him from a reverie of Harry. He rises slowly and pads over to let the man enter, for whom else could it be at this time in the morning? Harry stands on the threshold looking lost and alone. “I couldn’t sleep,” he blurts. “All I could think about was you. I couldn’t stay still, I had to come, I wanted to.”

Severus feels his heart soar. He had hoped and dreamed, but never really believed that his deepest desire would come true, that such a wonderful creature would one day turn to him.

“Harry,” he breathes. The foolish idiot is shivering, stupidly coming down to the dungeons in just a pair of pyjamas. “You could have frozen out there, silly boy! What if I’d been asleep, I might not have heard you till morning? Coming here, half naked, in the middle of the night. It’s nothing but Gryffindor foolhardiness!” Severus chastises, sweeping him into an embrace.

“I think it’s more than that,” Harry replies, wrapping his arms around Severus’ neck, green eyes sparkling even in the half-light of the candles. “I think it was love, actually.”

finis